I LOVE YOU – episode 6

She got to where I was standing, stared at my expressionless face for a while, rose to her toes and then pecked me, or should I say kissed me on my cheek, cos it lasted a couple of seconds. She then said “goodbye” and turned to go. I wanted to draw her back, to really kiss her but something was saying “Kelvin, don’t do it”, another was saying “you love her, call her, kiss her, tell her you love her”.

I just stood there, lost in my thoughts of million issues. It was as if fire works were going on in my head. I stood speechless.

Snapped back to life by the sudden movement of rats in the nearby bush, I shouted “sarang haeyo”, I know it was a safe way to tell her I love her, since I know she doesn’t watch Korean movies.

I walked to my room thinking about all that happened, on my way, isaw some people praying on the field between block 2 and annex. That was my prayer spot wheni first resumed. I used to pray, study,and go to fellowship (that even my roommates knows the four places I could be on campus), but now going to Sunday service is all that’s left with me.

I felt I was looking back, loving the world, lusting….. but suddenly, this thught came “ afterall,we were told to love our neighbour as our self,,and am not fornicating”.

I just walked by to my room as I plugged m earpiece, listening to Christian rap by lecrae- my best rap artist.

We were through with phy 106. It was kinda hard, with questions we were not properly taught how to solve, popping out, I guess we are becoming stalites gradually.

I looked around as I got out of the hall, looked around but couldn’t find hadizat, asked a couple of classmates, finally, tope said she saw her go donstairs. I looked down from the verandah of yellow house where we had the paper, I saw her come out of the reception downstairs, I called her, but she only made some gestures with her hand which I don’t understand. Is she avoiding me? Or was she embarrassed with what she did yesterday?  If she was I ran after her to tell her it was okay. I caught up with her at yellow house basement, hadizat! I called out. She stopped.

Hadizat: oh! Kelvin,  am sorry, I have to go…………
Me:where? Are you avoiding me? If its about yesterday, am fine. In fact, am here to tell you this…
(I bent over and gave her a kiss on her cheek)” I love you”
Hadizat:whao! Thanks, but actually, I wasn’t avoiding you. I got a call from mum to go and see my grandma here in IFE , she took ill and was hospitalized yesterday. So, am rushing oer to see her state of health. I’d call you when I get back.

All she said wasn’t making sense to me. I was thinking about what I just did as I watched her go.
Why did I do that? Surely that wasn’t planned. Something within me had shouted “Kelvin” as I kissed her, I think it was blessing’s voice.

I walked to my room, partly happy and partly sad. I thought “should I call blessing?(my friend in UNIBEN), and tell her all that is happening to me?. How would she take it?!. I was ashamed of telling my deeds to her. I had known her since jamb class, and I know she’d scold me if I told her such. But I had told her most things about me, even my ‘ordinary’ friendship with hadizat. She knows things about me, that even my mum doesn’t know.

Fortunately or unfortunately, my phone rang, it was blessing. She hadn’t called n along time.

Our talk on phone is always long that even #200 call card is barely enough, we mostly talked with free airtime, whatsapp had been helpful anyways.

Me:hello
Blessing: ore mi! how are you
Me: fine, you?
Blessing: good. You sound dull, whats wrong?
Me: uhm!! Its…………………………………………………………………………


Did I tell her?